Taking the leap..

Tomorrow is the day I resign. There is nothing that scares me more than thinking about what my future holds. Walking away from a job that has allowed me to get ahead with my business is not a decision I take lightly. My heart literally sinks into my stomach at the thought. But nevertheless it needs to be done. I asked the universe to give me a sign of when that time would be. After my last round on site I was left feeling uneasy about my position and what my mining future looked like.

Not only do I feel uneasy at the thought of going back to work, I have just been handed some extremely unbelievable hands to play. One was the chance to be a vendor at the Country 2 Country Festival, followed by a trade fair position at the Sydney retail expo AND the short listing of the CHRC excellence award for emerging business of the year. All of which these events fell whilst I was rostered to be at work. That means I had a decision to make, forfeit my chance at these events or finally pull the pin. Suffice to say that was enough of a sign to pull the pin.

So here I am, the night before I go back to work. Laying in bed feeling anxious about what tomorrow will bring. Will they try to stop me? Wil I just cave under pressure? Will they make me give extended notice? Will they just say good riddance and send me home early? The thoughts running through my head are unbelievable. It’s really tough when you don’t genuinely hate your job. I like the people I work with and get paid a very decent 6 figure income. I imagined this decision to be like a blaze of glory, a big F you to the powers to be. But really it’s just a quiet slide into the next chapter of my life. My partner is my biggest support and has always said ‘whenever you thing it’s time’. So many people have tried to talk me out of it. “Your already in the top 5%”, “Your business isn’t that sustainable it’s not old enough”, “Are you sure it’s the best decision”, “I just don’t think it’s time”. The list goes on. Perhaps that’s why it’s taken me so long to jump. 

One thing I’m learning though is who my real support systems are. Among the close nit ‘haters’ there’s so many people who are rallying for the leap. Almost pushing me, it’s like they know something I don’t. They believe in me even more than I believe in myself. I’ll always cherish those people. 

Well, here’s to hoping that the hard work and dedication I’ll put into my business will be enough to outweigh the sacrifice of a steady income. Doesn’t matter who you are in this world. Tough decisions will always be tough decisions. Doing what’s best for you has to be the goal. Because at the end of the day you’re the one that has to live with the consequences. 

The biggest thing that helps me feel somewhat at ease is this thought. If I’ve built a million dollar business by spending only 50% of my time and energy on it, imagine the capacity it could have if I spend 100% of my time and energy. Not only that BUT if it all falls over into a pile of nothing then at least I can say I gave it everything I had and then some.

Ange Xx